Sad face won't last.

This is how I have been feeling for the last few days. My poor kid just didn't get any candy from a pinata at a birthday party. yeah thats pretty bad too. He is a small guy and I am feeling small.

Well I had my whole body scan on Thursday and was expecting to put this all behind me but lymph nodes lite up . I am not sure what this all means yet I have to go back tomorrow for more pictures inthe nuclear medicine department which seems like a mysterious area to me in medicine, no one in the hospital seems to know what they do behind close doors. I may just shuffle around tomorrow trying to find out their secrets. I hope I don't need surgery soon, maybe the radiation I had was enough to stun the cancer into submission.

I wish this easy cancer knew how to behave, it seems to be behaving poorly and needs a time out. I will keep you posted.

Post radioactive isotope is RAD.

This the lead lined canister that contained 2 blue pills that had about 153 millicuries of radioactive material. I put it on my hand then was going to take a picture and was told to hurry and get it off my hand since the radiation being emitted was so high it needed to get into me quickly. Yeah that will make me swallow it down faster.

Immediately the Geiger counter came out and it registered 74 milliRems per hour emitting from my abdomen. Within just 24 hours it dropped down to about 45 millirems per hour. Planes are not allowed to fly at that high of an elevation due to effects on passengers in the plane and alarms go off to make sure they stay well below 50millirems of cosmic radiation.

The next day I dropped down to about 3millirems emitted per hour of radiation which is like background levels, still high enough to make sure I keep my distance.

The isolation room I was confined to was intolerable for these few days was lined in plastic and I must say it was a personal prison for me with the occasional very poor treatment, since the staff was not well prepared for someone like me, only about 2 people a month if that go through this treatment. I was like a leper that could throw a limb at the staff so there was very little interaction at all, just the intercom and a phone wrapped in plastic. Wow I found that isolation was isolating Weird huh? Stockholm syndrome is real I was throwing myself at the first person that would put more than their arm into my room.

I am now home and missed my family as it is now day 6 from treatment and I have to confess, I was kept longer due to my stage fright to produce a bowel movement. SHIT yes..I was given 10 medications in less than 20 hours to produce said product to no avail. My radiation levels would drop more quickly if we could close this deal. I was sent home with 4 differant meds to help complete this mission, they were very concerned since they would have no place to put me if I needed to be readmitted into the hospital easily. I have spoken to more people about crap than I would care to admit and I will leave with only that there has been success and I must say I debated renting a plane to fly a banner.

I will have a full body scan on Thursday and await good news that there will be no spots that light up. Lets hope for that. I will eat sushi until I develope some worm or fin.

Goodnight my friends and I thank each and everyone of you for the inspiration that lights a unchartered path for me. THANK YOU.

Finally I will be one HOT chick....

Yup One HOT chick. I do laundry.I am getting my life in order to be away from the family for about 8 days. I am to stay 3 to 6 feet away due to my hot factor. On Monday I will become radioactive as I start my hopefully, final treatment, for cancer. I must get the stinking ass laundry room in check before grandma Kay arrives, she must think that raising kids now a days has gotten so easy shmeazy for us old Gen X ers. Or or we Generation Y? Why have we ever labeled ourselves?I have dumbed down so much I don't know what I am....

I have such large bags under my eyes that I have trouble finding my way around.I would never recognize a Y or an X or a Z . This getting hypothyroid for my treatment makes me very tired and forgetful, I am clearly not very sharp. When Byron asked if the fruit orange was named after the color orange I was stumped. Not really sure still.

I go in on Monday morning for radiation so much so I will be in isolation for about 2 full days. I will get about 150 millicurie of radioactive isotopes...that is alot if we can rememeber physics.
I do know someone had to get the lowest score and on one exam that was me as I had to point out to the teacher in college that we all contribute to the bell curve. You are welcome class of 1995.

Well I will be finally so hot that I need my own radiation safety officer to check me daily. I cannot have my cell phone or computer as I will contaminate them with radiation so I will have those old 13 channels dial changer tvs in my room and probably a rotery telephone too. UGGGG to go so 80's how did I survive? Oh thats right I was out dating and carrying on and bypassed technolgy. Im not sure I cared then, I was busy. BUT I care now....

I must say the kids are great about it all , Byron just wants to know what day I can't sleep with him....weird Ray doesn't seem to ask..hum .. It will be about 2 weeks without a snuggle from my kids oooooothat it soooooo hard. So I will let grandma K take over and do the cooking and snuggling and momming for awhile. It is really hard.

I wil be reading and pillow surfing and that should fill my days this is ever moms dream to check out of momdom and vacate the position for some way needed R&R. I will probably look liike a fetus when I leave the hospital, I will surely chew my own cord off since I have so much experience as a 40isher. REALLY is that what I am? Did I just make up that silly word? Yup i did. Maybe this is the last time you will see it.

Wish me well in my own thoughts for several days and not hang myself with a IV tubing. God speed to a less vomitous week to come.

PS I may have to get some of that ovation hair therapy as I am thinning like an eldrly lady.